Thursday, March 27, 2008

It's hard being the fat one.........

Yesterday I picked Brighton up from school. That's what I love about my retirement and that's what keeps me from getting greedy and going back to work a "Real Job." The business is at a point where I could work a full-time position and it would be incredible to have a steady paycheck in addition to the spoils of tax season.........

Missy says she couldn't stand to live with me trying to maintain a full time job and keep up with the businesses. For right now I'm content mowing a few yards and running Joseph's WRECKERS during the off season.

On to my point of this post. With a skinny minnie wife...even though she's pregnant and will gain about 100 pounds....I'm the fat one in the family. My goal is to lose more weight than she gains this year. That's almost what I did when Brighton was born. When we found out we were pregnant 7 years ago, I decided I had to get into the best shape of my life because after the baby I wouldn't have time or the energy to exercise....which has been in part true, and in part not true. I could make the time, but finding the energy is difficult. I should have never quit my regiment. But I did, and now I'm back to where I started.

I have my high's and low's as far as weight goes. My high is my mission weight. My low is my highschool weight. Right now, I'm pushing my high, and if I don't make some changes, my new high will be my infinitely increasing weight.

I was reminded yesterday that it's no fun being the fat one. When I got home that afternoon with Brighton mommy was so excited to give Brighton a special afterschool treat....a Nestles icecream drumstick. You know, the ones that have a choclate core, the choclate top and nuts on top. Yea, you're craving it now.

After seeing Brighton get her afterschool treat, and knowing that I'd wait infinitely (she loves me but not June Clever style.....which is good and know what I mean?...sweet and sour....know what I mean??? I'd better stop or I'll get censored.) So rather than hope my sweetheart wife offer me an afterwork treat (the icecream!!! get your minds out of the gutter!!! Sheesh!!!), I made way for the freezer to indulge myself.

To my disappointment there were none in the freezer.

"How come there aren't any left! Missy how many have YOU eaten?"

ASPEN then informed me with a loud yell: "DADDY YOU DON"T GET ANY BECAUSE YOU"RE TOO FAT!"

It's hard being the fat one.

I think she subsequently perceived the viciousness of making fun of her fat daddy. When questioned why daddy didn't get any ice cream she now says:

"There were only four icecreams. One for mommy, Brighton, ME, and Ryder. NONE for you."

Me: "I thought you said I was too fat."

Aspen: "You're just a little fat."

She's so sweet!

I'm going to get a bowl of peanutbutter choclate icecream w/ Hershey's Syrup! Hooray for fat daddy's!


Alice Wills Gold said...

Aren't daddy's supposed to be a little fat?..that is what makes them so loveable.

Mother 25 - 8 said...

I feel your pain man, I feel your pain.

LeGrand said...

Our family went to Dollywood last week and I almost didn't get to ride the Thunder Head roller coaster because the lap bar wouldn't fit over my fat stomach. I vowed to loose weight as all four attendants come over and gave me advice on how to fit into the coaster's car with about 100 other people waiting in line watching the whole thing. After about three minutes it finally worked and I got to ride. Abigail was sitting next to me and I'm sure she was mortified but she never said anything.

My weight loss goal is to ride rollar coasters at Dollywood and not embarass my kids in the process.

crashomatic said...

Thanks LeGrand.........

You just made me feel a little less fat......but I haven't been to Dollywood since we went with Grandma Gold and Brighton was barely walking.

I may have the same problem the next time I find myself at the Dollywood Rollercoasters.......

They're probably just small coasters anyways..........

I feel your pain.

Alice Faye said...

Boys, I hate to tell you this but your genetics are against you. I want Duane to be around longer than age 72 (that's when Grandpa departed from us) so we are eating better and exercising more. It's not easy but it's worth it. I only make cookies now when I know you are going to be around. Not your Dad, just you!!